8 Quick Ways To Calm Down Instantly
Written by Michelle Ong | September 10, 2024 | Wellness
Are you someone who sometimes acts impulsively on their emotions, only to regret it later? Whether it’s snapping at a mean critique, reacting harshly to negative feedback, firing off a text without thinking, or feeling frustrated by a last-minute change in plans, we’ve all been there. Acting on impulse can lead to regret, strained relationships, or missed opportunities. In this post, we’ll explore quick ways to avoid these knee-jerk reactions and handle tough situations with more grace and composure.
1. Just Pause
“The greatest remedy for anger is delay.” —Seneca
When negative emotions start to bubble up and you’re tempted to snap back, shout, or even lash out, remind yourself to pause and choose to do nothing. In that brief moment of restraint, you’ll feel the power of self-control and later thank yourself for not acting on impulse and avoiding regret.
While you pause, gently acknowledge your feelings—be it anger, guilt, or worry. Recognize that having emotions is normal. Don’t deny or ignore them; instead, observe them and save your response for later, after you’ve had time to process.
2. Distance Yourself
“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.” —Viktor Frankl
When emotions run high, it’s helpful to step away from the situation or trigger if possible. For example, if you’re in a heated argument with a coworker, excuse yourself to gather your thoughts. This break gives you time to cool down, think more clearly, and respond thoughtfully rather than impulsively. The same applies to texting conversations—resist the urge to reply immediately when you’re upset. Put your phone away, take a breather, and return to the conversation when you’re calmer and can respond more rationally.
3. Recite A Mantra
While you pause or after removing yourself from the trigger, recite a personal mantra that resonates with you, such as “I am bigger than this” or “I can stay calm.” Repeating this simple phrase silently or out loud can help soothe your mind and bring a sense of calm.
4. Take A Deep Breath
Once you’ve stepped away from the emotional trigger, take a few deep breaths in a quiet space. This helps you cool down and shift your focus away from the negativity. Deep breathing calms your body’s stress response, bringing your emotions back to a balanced state.
While taking deep breaths, notice how your body tenses up from strong emotions and consciously relax those muscles. Focus on your surroundings and sensations to ground yourself in the present moment. This detachment helps calm your mind. For more on mindfulness, check out this post on Zen principles.
5. Divert Your Focus
Another effective way to manage negative emotions is to count to a chosen number. This simple mental task diverts your focus, giving your mind a break from intense feelings and helping you regain control before reacting impulsively. You can also use a stress ball or fidget toys to distract yourself and help relieve stress.
6. Get Moving
If deep breaths and counting aren’t enough, try physical exercise to shift your focus. A brisk walk outside, a run, or a gym session can get your blood pumping and release endorphins, boosting your mood and helping you feel calmer and more balanced.
7. Challenge Negative Thoughts
Negative thoughts often lead to impulsive reactions, as your mind sees the antagonist’s actions as personal attacks and responds instinctively. To manage this, first acknowledge and examine these thoughts, questioning their validity and considering whether a reaction will truly benefit you. This shift in perspective can help regain control over your emotions.
Those skilled in emotional management might assess their response while pausing, but if you’re less experienced, it’s better to remove yourself from the trigger and reflect on your thoughts with focused attention before deciding on your next steps.
8. Practice Compassion
A common pitfall is falling into self-criticism or shifting blame onto others. When you take a pause and distance yourself from the source of your emotions, avoid these default reactions.
If you tend to blame yourself, practice self-compassion: reassure yourself that it’s okay to feel what you’re feeling, and remember these emotions will pass. Treat yourself with the same kindness you’d offer a friend in distress.
If you blame others, recognize that everyone has their own struggles and their actions may reflect their insecurities. Try to give others the benefit of the doubt and approach them with kindness.
Check out the Pinterest pins below for more self-care ideas.
You Can Do It
You control how you respond to life’s ups and downs, so choose wisely. Mastering emotional control takes practice, so be patient and consistent. With time, you’ll improve in managing your emotions more constructively and find greater inner peace.
Check out these posts on effective ways to manage your emotions and the Japanese principles for cultivating mindfulness and peace.
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